Freedom

Reflection on life and endings

https://www.mysticstamp.com/ (keyword "Emancipation")

Freedom is a quality that is in a permanent state of renewal. It is not lasting or guaranteed. Shackles don't guarantee bondage and those without chains are not all free.

So why tether my body to earth, why commit my flesh and bones ... to an address once my soul flees confinement?

I sit alone, not lonely thinking about the years ahead.

My spaces remain undisturbed. We gather in public spaces to celebrate each other and then I return alone to this location on a map. My geographies are many.

My homes few. However I have enjoyed visiting strangers, strange lands. I enjoy the return more once I am back.

There is no where I'd rather be than here. Here I am safe. Here I am comfortable. Here I am surrounded by familiar things.

Here is a nice launching pad to other sites where I am also welcomed.

As I think about wills and burials, I feel myself leaning into simplicity.

I went to an art exhibit that featured cremation...the process of committing fire to consume the flesh and bones of a beloved person. Ashes look so indescript. What was once a distinct personality recognizable is an image in a heart. Not these cold gray ashes.

Gone are the false walls erected to separate one life one body from another. Fire erases the superficial.

Perhaps this is why I fear it and embrace it.

Fire is honesty. Fire is truth.

Throw this fragile home into the kiln. Let the flames be her final dance. Play her favorite tune.

Perhaps we'll all hum and cackle and pop out of tune as everything melts into the glowing red darkness.

Ashes look like my hair color gray. The bones are white. The texture is fine.

My friend Fred's ashes sit by my stove. I have a framed photos of us together there too to show what he looked like when spirit joined his corporal body.

I remember releasing some of the dust at Harbour Way Park in Oakland. He liked it there.

My friend Monica's ashes sit in her mother's drawing room. I think Paula's have joined Monica's on the mantel.

Legacy.

A legacy is not the plot or urn that holds remains because I will not be there.

I will be everywhere because it's easier to be everywhere when gravity can no longer hold a body down.

I am not complaining. I am a bit attached to this body and to other bodies. I am sad when they are making their way to destinations I am not ready to follow.

I am old now so these crossings are within view. I try to stay in touch by phone, by email, by text, by telethapy.

I visit too. I write letters, but travel is something I no longer enjoy as much.

I like being home or close to home.

Burial plots

I thought about a bench along a shoreline. It's hecka expensive. I want my bench in a place where my people are. I like the idea of randomness.

Being stumbled upon.

Trees 🌳 are great...hey I am cool with the Wonda Grove, however, benches are places to pause, contemplate, give thanks, take a sip of water, watch a sunset, it's an opportunity for remembrance

Remembrance of this Black Wxmxn life. Yep. My name's on the bench: Ms. Wonda Wander Sabir

Note

Perhaps folks who care need to start saving up.

I have allocated my insurance to my 5 grandchildren. My bench will be a gift to Souljourning for Truth.